A BOLD NEW DIRECTION FOR BEER JOURNALISM

Editor’s Note: Let’s all welcome our newest contributor, Mr. Todd Pharris to the ol’ website. He’ll be contributing some “humorous” articles whenever he sees fit, or I get to sick Lykins on him. Take it from here, Todd…

A BOLD NEW DIRECTION FOR BEER JOURNALISM

…is something you won’t be getting from this column. When I was asked by louisvillebeer.com Founder and noted Internet Bully John Wurth to write for this prestigious website, I listened in horror to his threats of destroying me personally and professionally if I turned him down. I weighed my options, and decided to give it a go.

Every once in a great while, I’m vaguely recognized by someone I don’t know, as in “Hey, you’re that beer guy at that place” or “Hey, I’ve seen you drink with Minor Local Celebrity John King” or “You’re the bastard who cut in front of my grandma at the Hometown Buffet.” In my defense, she was dawdling. Plate up those mushy carrots and move along, Carry Nation! Anyway, I assume this column will launch me into the kind of superstardom that would crush a lesser man (Editor’s Note: No, it won’t). I look forward to being recognized by a stranger who hates my writing style, my sense of humor, or the Oxford comma.

Apocalypse Brew Works 2nd Anniversary

I love Apocalypse and what they do, which is brew good beer and invite delicious food trucks to their parking lot. Armed with a Weather Channel app forecast of “65 and light rain” I ventured to Apocalypse to drink their Oertel’s 1912 Dark Cream Ale and eat pork tacos from The Traveling Kitchen.

Well, “light rain” my ass, Weather Channel! The skies opened up and delivered a real gully washer. Those of us who survived the monsoon that day will years from now speak of it in hushed tones like WWII vets talk of storming the beach at Normandy (because we’re sheltered people who have endured no real hardships in life, but still… it was wet out there). Despite the rain, I met a few like-minded souls and drank a few beers. When it stopped raining, I went to a friend’s house nearby, dried off, and went back. I am happy to report that the crowd really picked up once the weather cleared. Leah, Bill, Paul, and everyone involved with Apocalypse deserved a good turn out and I’m glad they eventually got one.

My advice to you is to go to Apocalypse one weekend and try the Oertel’s 1912. Tell ’em Todd sent you and be met with a blank stare that’s sure to make things a little awkward.

  1. A worthy appointment, indeed. I hope you took the stock options over the exhorbitant salary and company car…

    Reply

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